A Tidal Wave of Petty Theft.

Have I unintentionally broken the law? Oh boy, I’m not sure I should tell you anything about that. What is the statute of limitations?

ADMIT NOTHING! DESTROY ALL THE EVIDENCE!

I have not only unintentionally broken the law, but have also done so unwittingly.

I remember working for a certain retail chain years ago; in the department with audio CDs and DVDs. It was a Tuesday and I was excited because it was release day for a particular audio CD that I had been eagerly awaiting.

I was looking at the front cover artist photo on the CD when I was called away, either to assist a customer or perform some menial task. I must have dropped the disc in to the large pocket of my company smock/apron.

After completing my shift I purchased a copy of the disc. When I got to my car I ripped the plastic shrink film from the disc and slotted it into my car stereo. I listened to the first couple songs on my short drive home from work. I was not disappointed.

Just a little while later, after arriving home that evening, I tossed my apron over the back of a chair and heard the sharp crack of a plastic CD jewel case slapping against the dining room table. I thought “that’s funny, didn’t I leave that CD in my car?” It was at that moment I realized I had inadvertently stolen a second copy of the CD!

I wonder if you will ask about the album. It was Fiona Apple’s debut album, Tidal released thirty years ago, in 1996. I won’t post the cover photo because: copyright, but search it and look into her eyes. Mesmerizing.